With the death of the Queen, a week ago today, there seems to be so much grief around, grief for the Queen, grief for the change in monarchy – the stability of always having a constant in the world and, for many, grief for someone they have lost in the past.
It is said each loss brings up the pain of the loses that have gone before, this can be seen in the reactions of many with the loss of the Queen. It can bring up the memories of the death of people we love, of those dark, seemingly endless days and the depth of sorrow that comes with grief. It can remind you of the person you love, of all they represented and brought to your life, it can bring up memories, feelings and emotions you thought long since ‘dealt with’…….. I suppose what I am trying to say is that it is ok to feel sad, whether it be for the Queen, her family or yourself – it isn’t a nice feeling, by any stretch, but maybe, at the moment, it is understandable and there for a reason.
So how do I cope with it I hear you cry, well maybe it is about just sitting with it, letting it be, grief is there for a reason, because someone we loved, cared for, someone we admired is not. So if you feel you need to cry, cry, if you feel you need to remember, remember, and if you feel overwhelmed and need to step away, step away. In grief I feel it is important to listen to what you need, and, as much as you can, honour that feeling. Talk to people around you, if you have no one you feel you can talk to then reach out further afield, there are several services out there aimed at supporting people in grief – no matter when that grief happened or who it was that died. GriefChat is an online web-chat staffed by bereavement counsellors open Monday – Friday 9am – 9pm at https://griefchat.co.uk/chat/ and Cruse has a helpline and online web-chat https://www.cruse.org.uk/get-support/
and of course there is also bereavement counselling, talking to an impartial, non-judgmental individual about where you are at and what it is like for you can help you to find a way to bear that grief.
It feels like you will feel like this forever, but you won’t, it will change over time.
Comments